BTN: July

July 2011
Well July is half way over. I haven't had much of anything fun to say. It's getting harder and harder on us month to month, but we know the payoff in the end will be worth it all. Chris had a trip to Indiana this past week and in order for me to relax and for us to be together for when it counts I went along with him. It was a great trip and just the stress free week I needed away from work.

We ended the week golfing in an annual outing with the Casey family. Tim and Sarah are the only ones that know we are trying. The Casey men form one foursome and the Casey women form another. The bloody mary's, screw drivers and vodka lemonades are usually flowing hard during this outing. Thankfully with Sarah being pregnant is wasn't going to be weird to order a non-alcoholic drink.....or so I thought. The plan was I would get the first round of drinks and while Sarah distracted Barb and Jenny I would order two NA Bloody's and Sarah would get the second round. Hopefully after two rounds BBQ and J would be none the wiser.

That's how it was suppose to work. Instead the Beverage Girl turned and said here is the alcoholic bloody and here is the two NA bloody's. There was utter shock on Barb and Jenny's faces and horror on mine and Sarah's. It was all good in the end. I blamed it on the "Stupid Bev Girl" for not hearing me right and since I still feel okay drinking red wine before finding out if I'm PG or not I had some later in the evening to throw them off. I still think they are on to me though.

July 25th, 2011
Took a test this morning and it came back negative. I'm still waiting for mother nature to kick in though. If there's nothing in 2 days I'll test again, but it's looking like I won't come to that. I feel like I'm going through stages of grieve. I was in denial the first few times that things weren't working out, then I was depressed about it, now I'm just plain pissed off! Chris likes to go look at the result of the test before me and his face is never hard to read, so I always know the answer before he comes back. Today he says "When this actually works out for us I'm not sure if the disbelief is going to be from thinking oh my god I'm going to be dad or if I'm going to think the test must be wrong you'll have to take another." Long story short...It's getting old....real old!